Remember ME - You Me and Dementia

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

In UK Mother-in-law nightmare with rise in ageing population

As our population ages, pensioners will increasingly rely on their children to put a roof over their heads, experts say.

But the prospect of an intrusive mother-in-law who puts a strain on a child's marriage is no laughing matter for many.

A study shows that 60 per cent of couples fear an elderly relative in the house would push their relationship to the brink.

Only 17 per cent would ask their parents to move in if they were struggling on their own.

Despite the practical difficulties, 63 per cent wanted parents to stay in their own homes - suggesting that many pensioners will be left in the lurch.

They could be forced to sell their home to meet the costs of living in a care home or sheltered accommodation.

Of those questioned, 19 per cent said they would consider paying for this for their parents.

One per cent were prepared to pay for elderly parents to be cared for in their own homes.

Mike Bingham, of, which provides advice on issues associated with having an old relative, said: "This topic is especially pertinent at this time of year as millions prepare to entertain their elderly relatives over Christmas.

"This is the perfect time for inlaws to drop less than subtle hints about moving in.

"Gags about the mother-in-law moving in are commonplace. But, joking apart, the prospect of a permanent elderly house guest can be extremely stressful.

"Telling your elderly parents you do not want them to move in with you is a very difficult conversation to have. It is equally stressful telling your husband or wife that your parents are moving in.

"We have an ageing population so we need to think about how we are going to deal with this."

Official figures show over-65s increased by 31 per cent between 1971 and 2006. And the population is expected to continue ageing.


Forget yourself for others, and others will never forget you.

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